Wow…raised and refined by the fire.
Many of you know I have been absent for about seven months from social media. This is my first interaction since that time.
That is because on June 22nd our home and office were destroyed by fire. We were not at home, and we were not injured…physically that is. The cause of the fire has been under investigation for a product defect.
When you lose everything, you do not get up the next day and go about your business you get up and go about the busyness of recovery.
It has taken my husband and I six months to obtain a sense of normalcy again. We are in a new house with new clothes and furnishings still not quite feeling like home but working on it.
In the meantime, there have been countless people who have shown such kindness, grace, and generosity to us. Some I have never met and do not even know. Not sure I can ever thank everyone, and whether they hear it from me or not, we are ever so grateful to them all.
When you go through something like this and you are not prepared for it, it leaves an indelible mark. Something you will not forget and will speak of whether in depth or in passing from time to time for the rest of your life, as it is now part of your life’s story.
Through it all there are lessons to be learned and realizations to be had. So the best thing for me writing this, and for you reading this, who will go through stuff in your life…is to reflect on the lessons learned and convey them so they may help you as they have helped me.
- One God is real. He has been with us through the fire. If I tried to tell you the “But God” instances they are too numerous to mention from the big to the minuscule moments and revelations he has shown us.
- When you tell someone you will pray for them be sure to do it. My husband and I have actually felt the prayers of people and are so thankful for the strength and comfort it has given us.
- The world has many good people despite what you hear. People around you often feel helpless. There are people who want to help you…let them, as it helps them to.
- Everyone has tough things that happen in their life. So be kind because you do not know the battles people are fighting.
- Be grateful for the little things. We were able to pull some things from the fire, some I could salvage some I could not. But when I was able to save something no matter how small or inconsequential I would be so thankful and realize that most of the time it is the little things that matter.
- That things really are just things. We lost almost everything we had. This was tough because I loved my things…some things cannot be replaced or saved that is true, and I sometimes I still miss them. But in the scheme of things, they cannot be idols in my life.
- Victimization is a decision you make. You can choose to stay down or get up. When something is ripped away from you there is no closure…so you need to grieve maybe you cry, maybe you talk about it or maybe put it in writing, but You cannot let the negativity of the situation make you a victim. There is a time, and it is not set, when you must choose to rise up from the ashes.
- One day at a time and I mean that literally. Rising up from the ashes is a process, a series of stages, you enter and then move on to the next. I am not going to tell you this was easy…it was not! Some moments were pretty tough. Living within the day, sometimes feeling like I was walking through quicksand and going to bed maybe only accomplishing one thing, but it helped with not feeling overwhelmed and one day at a time I was a little further in the journey.
Tough things will happen in your life and mine. There is a saying I have thought of often “It is not what happens to you but what happens in you.”
I look back now and reflect on what we have gone through and sometimes still going through the process and I am actually thankful for where my husband and I are with our home and our marriage. He is my best friend and a wonderful man. We are living with a greater understanding of knowing who and who’s we are.
Risen from the ashes, refined by the fire, and ready for what comes next.
